a rock and a hard place wait for me, between the devil and the deep blue sea...
[moodconfused]
[musicsisters of mercy "rock and a hard place" ]
wow. i really need to sit down and think. so many things are going on that my head is spinning. on one hand i have a pretty chill arrangement with someone i get along with pretty well, and possibly evolving into something more, but with my perpetual fear of fucking up and incurring the wrath i've seen dealt to others with the same fate. someone who really likes me, but who runs the spectrum of cold as ice to all sorts of fiery with rage. i've seen both, which has made me very wary of this arrangement in the first place. that and the loss of community and beloved friends because of isolation. then there's the route my body and mind wants to take, someone who SAYS they like me, we have the opportunity to explore new parts of ourselves and each other, but their friends don't like or understand me, though my friends adore them, and i will also be isolated. also, and although it's not that big of a deal, i don't seem very high on their priorities, like i'm just something fun they can toy around with, which i don't like. i'm very confused right now. both are dangerous situations....
is neither an option? do i have to choose in the first place? can i just not choose? there is no easy way out of this one, really.
[musicsisters of mercy "rock and a hard place" ]
wow. i really need to sit down and think. so many things are going on that my head is spinning. on one hand i have a pretty chill arrangement with someone i get along with pretty well, and possibly evolving into something more, but with my perpetual fear of fucking up and incurring the wrath i've seen dealt to others with the same fate. someone who really likes me, but who runs the spectrum of cold as ice to all sorts of fiery with rage. i've seen both, which has made me very wary of this arrangement in the first place. that and the loss of community and beloved friends because of isolation. then there's the route my body and mind wants to take, someone who SAYS they like me, we have the opportunity to explore new parts of ourselves and each other, but their friends don't like or understand me, though my friends adore them, and i will also be isolated. also, and although it's not that big of a deal, i don't seem very high on their priorities, like i'm just something fun they can toy around with, which i don't like. i'm very confused right now. both are dangerous situations....
is neither an option? do i have to choose in the first place? can i just not choose? there is no easy way out of this one, really.
posted by magnum mouthed, i shoot to kill... at 2:11 PM
1 Comments:
Be no ones toy!
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